A Shameful Secret
by Kristen3
Summary: A very AU take on "Room Service." Niles wakes with guilt after spending the night in Lilith's arms, but maybe, just maybe, something wonderful can come out of this awful mistake. Rating is for adult themes.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: **I need to thank Andrea (iloveromance), because her story "The Niles I Never Knew" planted the seed for this. Also, I want to mention Melinda (samanddianefan10), since this is a "gift" to her, as well as my first attempt at writing Lilith. I sincerely hope I've done justice to one of my favorite characters in the _Cheers_/_Frasier _universe!

When Niles awoke, he felt a strange sense of guilt. Somehow, he knew he'd done something very wrong, but he wasn't quite sure what it was. Then he became aware of someone else in the room. He slowly rolled over, and noticed a very pale arm sticking out of the covers. His heart raced. Had he allowed himself to be seduced by Maris yet again? As his eyes traveled upward, he saw the face of the woman he'd spent last night with. It was not his pale, thin wife, but rather his pale, thin, ex-sister-in-law. As the events of last night came back to him, he began to hyperventilate.

Lilith woke to the sound of breathing. She squinted as her eyes opened, and she saw Niles staring at her in shock, gasping for breath. "Niles, calm down."

But the sound of Lilith's famous monotone voice actually had the opposite effect. His hyperventilating became worse.

Rolling her eyes, Lilith got out of bed. She walked over to the table, where a bottle of champagne stood inside a paper bag. Apparently, neither of them had had the sense to put it on ice last night. But it didn't matter now. She quickly took the bottle out of the bag, and handed the bag to Niles. He breathed into it several times, and his breathing became more normal. "Thank you," he finally said, handing back the bag.

"You're welcome." Lilith took it and placed it back on the table. "Well, I would ask if you enjoyed my...…..company last night, but I can see that you didn't."

"Oh, Lilith, this is no time for jokes! We _slept _together! Oh, this is awful!"

"Now, Niles, let's be rational. Obviously, we made a mistake. But it's over, and no one has to know."

A fresh wave of guilt hit Niles as he considered the ramifications of what he'd done. "Oh, God, I've betrayed Frasier in the worst way possible. And Daphne. This is a disaster!"

"Wait a minute. What does Daphne have to do with this? Does she know of your feelings toward her?"

Niles shook his head. "It's more clear than ever that I'm not worthy of her. I'm not worthy of anything!"

"Niles, please, get hold of yourself. We are two adults who lost our minds for a moment, but as I said, _no one needs to know_."

"But I don't love you...I love Daphne. How could I be here, doing _this_ with you, when I love her? Oh, God."

Lilith sat on the bed next to him. She took his hands in hers, hoping he would listen to her. "If you really feel this strongly for Daphne, perhaps you should tell her."

"I couldn't. How could she love me? Even_ I_ don't love me right now!"

"Listen to me." The sound of Lilith's firm voice finally made Niles look at her. "What we did here is shameful. We can agree on that. But perhaps some good can come of it."

Niles looked at her in confusion. "What?!"

"You just told me that you shouldn't have been with me last night, when you love Daphne. If that's true, then perhaps you need to tell her. I don't mean that you have to tell her what happened, but maybe it's time you went from pining for her to actually _loving_ her."

Her words surprised Niles. But in a way, it did make sense. Because, while he was aware that he'd crossed a line in sleeping with his brother's ex, he also felt guilty for somehow betraying Daphne. She may not be aware of his feelings, but Niles was, and apparently, he hadn't been thinking of his beloved angel when he came here. "I've tried so many times to tell her. But every time I do, I just get so dizzy, and I can't think straight."

"Well, you _are_ a psychiatrist, aren't you? What do you tell your patients to do when they are nervous about speaking?"

"I tell them to picture their audience in their underwear. I don't think that's going to help, Lilith!"

A sigh escaped from Lilith. "You just have to make up your mind. Don't second-guess it. Just go over to Fraiser's, and tell her how you feel. I know this is difficult, but isn't it better than living your whole life miserable?"

Niles thought about what she was saying. He hated to admit it, but Lilith did have a point. Seeing Daphne each day, loving her, was just too painful. There was always the question in his mind, _What if?__What if I told her? What if she didn't feel the same? What if she did?_

Suddenly, he stood. "I'm going to do it. Thank you, Lilith!" Before he could stop himself, he kissed her cheek. Immediately, he blushed. "Um, sorry..."

Lilith nodded. "Yes, yes, I know. Just go!" She waved him out the door. Sleeping with Frasier's brother had been a horrible mistake. But maybe, just maybe, there might be a happy ending for Niles.


	2. Chapter 2

Niles knocked on his brother's door. He could hardly believe that just hours before, he and Lilith had...no, he could not think of that now. What was done was done. The only possible way to free himself from the horrible guilt he was feeling was to use it. Lilith's words rang in his ears. _Make up your mind_, he told himself.

Unexpectedly, the door was opened by Daphne. All at once, Niles forgot why he'd come. "Oh, hello, Dr. Crane. I'm glad you're here. Your brother's been so worried about you."

"Um...he has?"

"Yes. He called you several times last night, but you weren't at home."

Niles swallowed hard. "I was...out." He knew he could say nothing more if he wanted to avoid a nosebleed.

"Oh. Well, would you like me to tell him that you're here?"

Niles shook his head. "Not right now. If that's all right."

Daphne was surprised. "If that's what you want."

"Um, yes. Actually, I was hoping to speak to _you_. May I come in?"

"Of course." She stepped back to allow him to enter. "What's on your mind?"

He took a deep breath. _Just make up your mind, Niles. You're a psychiatrist._ "Well, this is rather difficult to say, and it may come as a shock to you." He took a tentative step toward her. His heart raced uncontrollably. He closed his eyes. He knew he would need to say this now, before he lost his nerve. "Daphne, I love you."

"You love me? As in _love_ me?" Daphne couldn't believe it.

"Yes. I love you, and I've wanted to tell you for so long." He dared to reach out and touch her cheek. She did not stop him. The soft, warm feel of it was nothing at all like Lilith's. No matter what they'd done last night, his heart had not changed.

"But I don't understand. Why _me_? I'm no one special!"

"Oh, Daphne, you _are_ special! I could go on for days telling you all the things I love about you. But here are just a few highlights: The way you handle all of the frustrations that Dad and Frasier throw at you. No matter what, you find a reason to be happy. The way you care about people, especially your friends and family. The way you don't even realize how incredibly beautiful you are. Do you want me to continue?"

Daphne listened to all he said, but at the same time, she thought about him. His daily visits here had become a part of her routine. Despite the difference in their status, they had become very good friends. He always asked about her day, or complimented her outfit. These were small things, ordinary moments that she hadn't thought anything of at the time. But as she recalled them now, they came together to form a picture. Without her even realizing it, she had fallen in love with him. She moved toward him, hugging him tightly around the waist.

Niles hardly knew what to think as he held her in his arms. Again, he considered the contrast to Lilith. This felt unbelievably right. But then came the guilt. Daphne had no idea that he'd betrayed his brother last night. He was a liar, pure and simple. All his life, Niles had told the truth. His ethics had always been impeccable. But then he recalled Lilith's words. It was their secret. Deep down, Niles knew he owed Daphne, and his family, the truth. But revealing it now could cost him everything. It was a risk he just couldn't take. Not now.

As he stood there, holding Daphne close, Niles Crane made a promise to himself. Someday, when the time was right, and all of this was nothing but a memory for him and Daphne, he would tell her what had brought him here today. He could only pray that she would see it as he did now: a regrettable mistake, which had led to the greatest miracle of his life.

**The End**


End file.
